This was written by a Metro Denver Hospice Physician: I was driving home from a meeting this evening about 5, stuck in traffic on Colorado Blvd., and the car started to choke and splutter and die - I barely managed to coast, cursing, into a gas station, glad only that I would not be blocking traffic and would have a somewhat warm spot to wait for the tow truck. It wouldn't even turn over.
Before I could make the call, I saw a woman walking out of the 'quickie mart ' building, and it looked like she slipped on some ice and fell into a Gas pump, so I got out to see if she was okay When I got there, it looked more like she had been overcome by sobs than that she had fallen; she was a young woman who looked really haggard with dark circles under her eyes. She dropped something as I helped her up, and I picked it up to give it to her. It was a nickel.
At that moment, everything came into focus for me: the crying woman, the ancient Suburban crammed full of stuff with 3 kids in the back (1 in a car seat), and the gas pump reading $4.95.I asked her if she was okay and if she needed help, and she just kept saying ' don't want my kids to see me crying,' so we stood on the other side of the pump from her car. She said she was driving to California and that things were very hard for her right now. So I asked, 'And you were praying?' That made her back a away from me a little, but I assured her I was not a crazy person and said, 'He heard you, and He sent me.'
I took out my card and swiped it through the card reader on the pump so she could fill up her truck completely, and while it was fuelling, walked to the next door McDonald's and bought 2 big bags of food, some gift certificates for more, and a big cup of coffee. She gave the food to the kids in the car, who attacked it like wolves, and we stood by the pump eating fries and talking a little. She told me her name, and that she lived in Kansas City Her boyfriend left 2 months ago and she had not been able to make ends meet. She knew she wouldn't have money to pay rent Jan 1, and finally in desperation had finally called her parents, with whom she had not spoken in about 5 years. They lived in California and said she could come live with them and try to get on her feet there.
So she packed up everything she owned in the car. She told the kids they were going to California for Christmas, but not that they were going to live there. I gave her my gloves, a little hug and said a quick prayer with her for safety on the road.
As I was walking over to my car, she said, 'So, are you like an angel or something?' This definitely made me cry. I said, 'Sweetie, at this time of year angels are really busy, so sometimes God uses regular people.' It was so incredible to be a part of someone else's miracle. And of course, you guessed it, when I got in my car it started right away and got me home with no problem.
I'll put it in the shop tomorrow to check, but I suspect the mechanic won't find anything wrong. Sometimes the angels fly close enough to you that you can hear the flutter of their wings...
Psalms 55:22 'Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and He shall sustain thee. He shall never suffer the righteous to be moved.'
Wednesday, 28 November 2007
Tuesday, 27 November 2007
Tired
I am trully tired this morning. I was woken up at about 11pm and could not get back to sleep until about 1:45am but had to wake up at 3:45am cos i had a 3hr drive to attend my lectures today.
My sleepless night could not have come at a worse time when i have been under enormous pressure at work, not sleeping nor eating properly with my exams round the corner as well.
I think i am going to have a migriane today, i can feel the pressure building up in my left eye.
I am going to need the soothing voice of a friend to drift me off to sleep tonight.
My sleepless night could not have come at a worse time when i have been under enormous pressure at work, not sleeping nor eating properly with my exams round the corner as well.
I think i am going to have a migriane today, i can feel the pressure building up in my left eye.
I am going to need the soothing voice of a friend to drift me off to sleep tonight.
The "Do for me" brigade
I have never in my life met a more selfless person than my very very dear friend Taiwo without whom, i can assure the good citizens of blogville, i will not be in the position i am in today, where i can afford to buy a cup of garri every day.
This man gave up so much for me that i am going to be unable to repay him no matter how much money i make in my life time.
There trully are few individuals like him and i would like to say from the bottom of my heart, that i will always be eternally grateful to you. You have no idea how much what you did means to me and i hope that one day, i can return a fraction of that favour. God will continue to bless and see you through.
On the other hand, i have met people who are members of the ever growing self serving "do for me" brigade that give absolutely nothing back but another request for more.
This is one of the problems with our society today, the ever expanding legion of people that want more; the offsprings from the Oliver Twist generation. But in saying that, i insult Master Twist cos he was a kid that was starved. These people are not starved, just greedy, constantly asking for more on a daily basis.
My friend Taiwo has never asked for anything in return for what he did for me and he has even forgotten the huge sacrifice he made for me.
To the "Give me your blood" brigade, i simply ask, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE FOR ME LATELY?
This man gave up so much for me that i am going to be unable to repay him no matter how much money i make in my life time.
There trully are few individuals like him and i would like to say from the bottom of my heart, that i will always be eternally grateful to you. You have no idea how much what you did means to me and i hope that one day, i can return a fraction of that favour. God will continue to bless and see you through.
On the other hand, i have met people who are members of the ever growing self serving "do for me" brigade that give absolutely nothing back but another request for more.
This is one of the problems with our society today, the ever expanding legion of people that want more; the offsprings from the Oliver Twist generation. But in saying that, i insult Master Twist cos he was a kid that was starved. These people are not starved, just greedy, constantly asking for more on a daily basis.
My friend Taiwo has never asked for anything in return for what he did for me and he has even forgotten the huge sacrifice he made for me.
To the "Give me your blood" brigade, i simply ask, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE FOR ME LATELY?
Friday, 23 November 2007
Ranting and raving
Copied this from a friends blogspace. This is how i have been feeling for sometime now..
Lately, i have been hovering round depression, feeling like a failed state.
Where waking up in the morning is more like 'i have to' not because i wantto.
I think my big mouth and want for PERFECTION has put me in a deeper dilemma, tango whatever.
Me and my big mouth, BIG dreams, Big talk,Big IDEAS,big and PERFECT THINGS I ALWAYS DREAM OF have put me in BIGGER DILEMMA,EXTRA THOUGHTS AND EXTRA PIMPLES! yeah am tired, tired, head Filled, running on thoughts, thoughts and worries.
I am ranting, tired and want to close my eyes, relax, sleep.maybe quarrel with someone, shout and let all the anger out.
Iam angry, Vexed sorely.I think i should dig a hole and SCREAM!! in it, 'loser'.
Be a drama Queen.
Be inconsiderate, Selfish,Selfcentred and all 'em self words
Sorry about the raving and ranting, its just been one of those weeks.
Lately, i have been hovering round depression, feeling like a failed state.
Where waking up in the morning is more like 'i have to' not because i wantto.
I think my big mouth and want for PERFECTION has put me in a deeper dilemma, tango whatever.
Me and my big mouth, BIG dreams, Big talk,Big IDEAS,big and PERFECT THINGS I ALWAYS DREAM OF have put me in BIGGER DILEMMA,EXTRA THOUGHTS AND EXTRA PIMPLES! yeah am tired, tired, head Filled, running on thoughts, thoughts and worries.
I am ranting, tired and want to close my eyes, relax, sleep.maybe quarrel with someone, shout and let all the anger out.
Iam angry, Vexed sorely.I think i should dig a hole and SCREAM!! in it, 'loser'.
Be a drama Queen.
Be inconsiderate, Selfish,Selfcentred and all 'em self words
Sorry about the raving and ranting, its just been one of those weeks.
Monday, 19 November 2007
You could save a life
You could save a life.
STROKE: Remember The 1st Three Letters... S.T.R.
My friend sent this to me and encouraged me to post it and spread the word. I agree. If everyone can remember something this simple, we could save some folks.
STROKE IDENTIFICATION: During a BBQ, a friend stumbled and took a little fall - she assured everyone that she was fine and just tripped over a brick because of her new shoes. (they offered to call ambulance)
They got her cleaned up and got her a new plate of food - while she appeared a bit shaken up, Ingrid went about enjoying herself the rest of the evening. Ingrid's husband called later telling everyone that his wife had been taken to the hospital - (at 6:00pm , Ingrid passed away.)
She had suffered a stroke at the BBQ. Had they known how to identify the signs of a stroke, perhaps Ingrid would be with us today.
Some don't die. They end up in a helpless, hopeless condition instead. It only takes a minute to read this... STROKE IDENTIFICATION:
A neurologist says that if he can get to a stroke victim within 3 hours he can totally reverse the effects of a stroke...totally. He said the trick was getting a stroke recognized, diagnosed, and then getting the patient medically cared for within 3 hours, which is tough. RECOGNIZING A STROKE
Remember the '3' steps, STR . Read and Learn!
Sometimes symptoms of a stroke are difficult to identify. Unfortunately, the lack of awareness spells disaster.
The stroke victim may suffer severe brain damage when people nearby fail to recognize the symptoms of a stroke.
Now doctors say a bystander can recognize a stroke by asking three simple questions: S * Ask the individual to SMILE .
T * = TALK. Ask the person to SPEAK A SIMPLE SENTENCE (Coherently) (eg 'It is sunny out today').
R * Ask him or her to RAISE BOTH ARMS .
If he or she has trouble with ANY ONE of these tasks, call 000 immediately!! and describe the symptoms to the dispatcher.
NOTE : Another 'sign' of a stroke is
1. Ask the person to 'stick' out their tongue.
2. If the tongue is 'crooked', if it goes to one side or the other that is also an indication of a stroke.
A prominent cardiologist says if everyone who gets this e-mail sends it to 10 people; you can bet that at least one life will be saved.
….and it could be your own…..
STROKE: Remember The 1st Three Letters... S.T.R.
My friend sent this to me and encouraged me to post it and spread the word. I agree. If everyone can remember something this simple, we could save some folks.
STROKE IDENTIFICATION: During a BBQ, a friend stumbled and took a little fall - she assured everyone that she was fine and just tripped over a brick because of her new shoes. (they offered to call ambulance)
They got her cleaned up and got her a new plate of food - while she appeared a bit shaken up, Ingrid went about enjoying herself the rest of the evening. Ingrid's husband called later telling everyone that his wife had been taken to the hospital - (at 6:00pm , Ingrid passed away.)
She had suffered a stroke at the BBQ. Had they known how to identify the signs of a stroke, perhaps Ingrid would be with us today.
Some don't die. They end up in a helpless, hopeless condition instead. It only takes a minute to read this... STROKE IDENTIFICATION:
A neurologist says that if he can get to a stroke victim within 3 hours he can totally reverse the effects of a stroke...totally. He said the trick was getting a stroke recognized, diagnosed, and then getting the patient medically cared for within 3 hours, which is tough. RECOGNIZING A STROKE
Remember the '3' steps, STR . Read and Learn!
Sometimes symptoms of a stroke are difficult to identify. Unfortunately, the lack of awareness spells disaster.
The stroke victim may suffer severe brain damage when people nearby fail to recognize the symptoms of a stroke.
Now doctors say a bystander can recognize a stroke by asking three simple questions: S * Ask the individual to SMILE .
T * = TALK. Ask the person to SPEAK A SIMPLE SENTENCE (Coherently) (eg 'It is sunny out today').
R * Ask him or her to RAISE BOTH ARMS .
If he or she has trouble with ANY ONE of these tasks, call 000 immediately!! and describe the symptoms to the dispatcher.
NOTE : Another 'sign' of a stroke is
1. Ask the person to 'stick' out their tongue.
2. If the tongue is 'crooked', if it goes to one side or the other that is also an indication of a stroke.
A prominent cardiologist says if everyone who gets this e-mail sends it to 10 people; you can bet that at least one life will be saved.
….and it could be your own…..
Sunday, 18 November 2007
Still on it
I am still in the process of moving my life to another part of the world.
One of the steps i have taken is to write to companies in the country i want to relocate to and the Lord has been really good as a few of those companies have written back to me, expressing their interest in having me on board.
This is a step i have decided i am going to take, so friends pray for me.
One of the steps i have taken is to write to companies in the country i want to relocate to and the Lord has been really good as a few of those companies have written back to me, expressing their interest in having me on board.
This is a step i have decided i am going to take, so friends pray for me.
Saturday, 17 November 2007
Why?
Can anybody in blogville help me?
Why is it that the things you put a great deal of effort into don't happen as you would like but the ones you make no effort about keep coming through?
I am at home a bit under the weather and feeling sorry for myself. Going to miss the Nigeria/Australia football match as well.
There simply is no justice in this world.
Why is it that the things you put a great deal of effort into don't happen as you would like but the ones you make no effort about keep coming through?
I am at home a bit under the weather and feeling sorry for myself. Going to miss the Nigeria/Australia football match as well.
There simply is no justice in this world.
Friday, 16 November 2007
Only Human
Love these words.........
Baby girl i wish you knew
how you help me make it through
every single moment of the day
don't ever let go of my hand
cos on your love i truly depend
really what i'm trying to say
i'm going through something thats hurting me
i need your healing hands all over me
to ease my mind and comfort me
to cheer me up cos i'm in grief
to see you feel my pain cos you are crying too
From the bottom of my heart this words i say
when i'm crying thats when i need your love
when i'm hurting, girl i need your love
i'm not afraid to admit i'm only human
when i'm crying i need to be in your arms
and when i'm hurting, thats when i need you most
I'm not afraid to admit i'm only human.
Baby girl i wish you knew
how you help me make it through
every single moment of the day
don't ever let go of my hand
cos on your love i truly depend
really what i'm trying to say
i'm going through something thats hurting me
i need your healing hands all over me
to ease my mind and comfort me
to cheer me up cos i'm in grief
to see you feel my pain cos you are crying too
From the bottom of my heart this words i say
when i'm crying thats when i need your love
when i'm hurting, girl i need your love
i'm not afraid to admit i'm only human
when i'm crying i need to be in your arms
and when i'm hurting, thats when i need you most
I'm not afraid to admit i'm only human.
Confused
Just had a few guys in my office debate the article "straight talking".
It seems not only African brothers feel this way. One of the guys came up with a very serious question and i hope the ladies in blogville will help me with an answer.
Which kind of Man do women really want? Do you want the man that is a 90's man; doing things the "equal way"? Or do you want the man of the 60's? Opening doors, paying for meals, pulling out your seat and all the rest?
I suspect you guys will like a hybrid then this leads me to the next point made by another colleague.
When a man does not cry, he is told he is not sensitive. When he does, he is to weak.
When a man asks what the lady wants, he can not take control. When he does, he is dominating.
Do you want equality in everything or just the things you chose?
So many questions are being thrown at me by colleagues but i am not strong enough to type all of them (stomach is still dancing the mambo).
We simply ask the ladies, in simple english, tell us what you want.
It seems not only African brothers feel this way. One of the guys came up with a very serious question and i hope the ladies in blogville will help me with an answer.
Which kind of Man do women really want? Do you want the man that is a 90's man; doing things the "equal way"? Or do you want the man of the 60's? Opening doors, paying for meals, pulling out your seat and all the rest?
I suspect you guys will like a hybrid then this leads me to the next point made by another colleague.
When a man does not cry, he is told he is not sensitive. When he does, he is to weak.
When a man asks what the lady wants, he can not take control. When he does, he is dominating.
Do you want equality in everything or just the things you chose?
So many questions are being thrown at me by colleagues but i am not strong enough to type all of them (stomach is still dancing the mambo).
We simply ask the ladies, in simple english, tell us what you want.
Quarantine
I have been placed on quarantine at work with only my laptop.
They dont want me spreading "germs".
I would go home, but the problem is i feel better for a few minutes, then the BL***Y stomach starts again, and i am in pain. Think i need to see a doc urgently.
Tried to eat last night but could not. spent most of the night on the toilet floor.
Pray for my healing, please?
They dont want me spreading "germs".
I would go home, but the problem is i feel better for a few minutes, then the BL***Y stomach starts again, and i am in pain. Think i need to see a doc urgently.
Tried to eat last night but could not. spent most of the night on the toilet floor.
Pray for my healing, please?
Not too good
I am terribly, terribly ill this morning and why i came to work, i still do not know. I could not sleep, throwing up 4 times during the night. During my drive to work, i had to park on the M25 and throw up.
I have the most excruciating stomach pain this morning.
I can see this is going to ruin my already miserable looking weekend. I have tickets to the Nigeria/Australia game in London. Anyone fancy them, call me.
I have the most excruciating stomach pain this morning.
I can see this is going to ruin my already miserable looking weekend. I have tickets to the Nigeria/Australia game in London. Anyone fancy them, call me.
Thursday, 15 November 2007
For the sake of........
For the sake of clarity, i am writing a postscript to my blog "straight talking". I am glad to say that out of the 4 women that i have spoken to about the contents of straight talking, 3 were able to understand and appreciate the message i was trying to put out.
I will for the sake of others that might not understand my blog come at you guys again saying i am not trying to bash women, simply trying to let females understand the major gripe of men against women.
At no point in that blog did i put the message out there to judge anyone based on their past.
The message i have tried to put out is this: As much as women have their complains about men, we have our complains as well and the one complain that seems to be constant is the issue of emasculating a man.
This article is not an objective look at the problems of the boy/girl dynamics, it is a biased one sided opinion. It simply is the opinion of a number of men i have spoken to and not a discussion about the good and bad sides of the sexes.
I will for the sake of others that might not understand my blog come at you guys again saying i am not trying to bash women, simply trying to let females understand the major gripe of men against women.
At no point in that blog did i put the message out there to judge anyone based on their past.
The message i have tried to put out is this: As much as women have their complains about men, we have our complains as well and the one complain that seems to be constant is the issue of emasculating a man.
This article is not an objective look at the problems of the boy/girl dynamics, it is a biased one sided opinion. It simply is the opinion of a number of men i have spoken to and not a discussion about the good and bad sides of the sexes.
Rest in peace
It has just come to my attention that the lady i bought my house from has passed away. I did not really know her but she came across as very gentle and honest.
She died aged 42 with two young kids and a husband left behind.
May her soul rest in peace.
Amen.
She died aged 42 with two young kids and a husband left behind.
May her soul rest in peace.
Amen.
Wednesday, 14 November 2007
Straight Talking
I had an interesting conversation with a friend last night and after that conversation ended, i kinda thought to myself, is this deja vu or have i had this conversation before with so many guy friends?
Upon further thought, it became clear to me that there was no need repeating the same conversation with the same group of people without actually letting those involved know about it. It is like whinging that the price of petrol has increased (again) and not doing anything about it. So here goes......................
LADIES.......................
How many times have we all heard you complain about the lack of good brothers?
Could the problem actually be; wait for it, you women? I can see the sharpening of claws and tongues going on. Before you cast me into the lions pit, read a bit further.
Let me start with the story of Andrew. At the age of 14 or 15, he gets enough courage to step to a girl he has had a crush on for a while. Kerry at this time, has the attention of the local bad boy that is a yr or two older than she is. Andrew one day, plucks up enough courage to walk over to Kerry to ask if she would not mind if he walked her home and talk with her. I bet all the fellas know what happens next cos we have all been there.
Kerry laughs in his face in front of all his friends and classmates, humiliating poor Andrew, cardinal sin of emasculating a guy.
One month on, bad boy treats Kerry badly because he never really liked her in the first place and during her state of sorrow, she comes across Andrew and believes this is more than a good time to take that walk with him because it helps to ease the pain she is feeling; another man is still interested in her but alas, Andrew is not having it. He is not ready to be the mumu that is the second class guy, the rebound fella so he does what Kerry did to him before, he humiliates her as well. A good guy has been turned bad. No young man grows up thinking, i am going to be a playa! Believe it or not, he is the product of an earlier encounter with a girl.
Ladies, follow me on another journey as we take a look at Robin. Robin is a jambite, green nose freshman in uni and he spots a really nice girl. He starts to chat with Jane, a freshman/jambite as well. One day, Robin was walking Jane back to the room on campus (after paying for her dinner) when a car pulls up next to them. Steve, a third year student that happens to be a club/frat boy beckons to jane to enter the car and without second thoughts about Robin, she jumps in and they drive off. You see, Robin cannot afford to drive a car on campus and he is not a club/frat boy but what he lacks in those "qualities", he makes for in integrity, sincerity and honesty but those are not qualities women look for?!
Robin is left with a hole not only in his heart but also in his pocket. From that day on, Jane becomes a big girl on campus cos the guy whose attention she is enjoying for the moment is a club/frat boy with a car.
When frat boy finishes with Jane, we know what happens next. Ladies you know the rest. It has happened to someone you know.
Meanwhile, Robin swears to himself that he will never be humiliated like that again so he too goes after a car and becomes the club/frat boy that disrecpects women and treats them with comtempt.
What i am about to write will put me in trouble with the "league of brothers" but i have seen too many female friends go through life without understanding the most basic of dynamics in the boy/girl relationship so hear goes;
Do not emasculate a man! That is it. The holy grail of answers to the one burning question in the heart of many women.
I hear the wrong set of women bellowing "can't you handle a strong woman, a woman that goes after what she wants, damning the consequences?"
I laugh. I laugh in the face of that rubbish because i know of no "stronger women" than my sisters but they unlike many, understand that unless you want to re-wire a man (which you can never achieve), you have to understand the fine balance of strenght against aggression. Too many women today do not know where to draw the line and mistake their aggression for strength. Emasculating a man is the greatest sign of aggression towards the man.
Nowadays, i hear this rubbish called "girlpower" being thrown around as a way of encouraging women to forget the true values that make them "Ladies" and behave in the same way as the most vile of men behave. This is not strength and there is no power in that. True strength comes in being able to display the right "qualities" while being "strong" enough to discard this modern rubbish of doing whatever you like, whenever.
I have a lot of respect for "strong" women that pursue goals and are high achievers who understand that (for most women), the respect and adoration of her strength by her family is more important than the acclaim of the lonely bra burning feminist that want nothing more than for other women to be as lonely and miserable as they are.
One of the people i hold up as a role model happens to be a friend of about 24yrs, whom i believe is a yr younger than i am. She is a true inspiration with the things she has done and achieved in her life. She embodies all that is right about what it means to be a "strong" woman while understanding that lifting up those around you is by far better than telling them that "if you can't deal with it, you know where to go." As much as she has achieved, she does not hesitate to listen, stand to be corrected and learn.
Heaven forbid you try engage some sisters in a conversation/debate about an issue nowadays, you are in trouble for not just saying "yes dear" bacause women nowadays want men they can push around, deny it all you want.
How many women actually understand that the more you push a man, the less you get?
On too many occasions it has been made clear that the less you push, the more you get. A man will always do that which you want to please you, if you are less pushy.
Stop, i hear the brothers saying. I am giving away too much but i feel that the more we are all able to learn, the more likelihood of reducing the ever growing number of divorces in the African communities.
Finally, women, if you take nothing away from my ramblings, understand this, and i am speaking from a man's angle, the success of a relationship/marriage is in your hands. The way you choose to handle every aspect of your relationship especially the increasingly sharpened tongues, decides if you will remain happy or become a statistic.
Understanding that you will be "stronger" for doing that which on the surface makes you look weak but actually gives you control surely is the way forward.
Think about it.
P.S I am only a voice of reason, not an enemy of progress.
Upon further thought, it became clear to me that there was no need repeating the same conversation with the same group of people without actually letting those involved know about it. It is like whinging that the price of petrol has increased (again) and not doing anything about it. So here goes......................
LADIES.......................
How many times have we all heard you complain about the lack of good brothers?
Could the problem actually be; wait for it, you women? I can see the sharpening of claws and tongues going on. Before you cast me into the lions pit, read a bit further.
Let me start with the story of Andrew. At the age of 14 or 15, he gets enough courage to step to a girl he has had a crush on for a while. Kerry at this time, has the attention of the local bad boy that is a yr or two older than she is. Andrew one day, plucks up enough courage to walk over to Kerry to ask if she would not mind if he walked her home and talk with her. I bet all the fellas know what happens next cos we have all been there.
Kerry laughs in his face in front of all his friends and classmates, humiliating poor Andrew, cardinal sin of emasculating a guy.
One month on, bad boy treats Kerry badly because he never really liked her in the first place and during her state of sorrow, she comes across Andrew and believes this is more than a good time to take that walk with him because it helps to ease the pain she is feeling; another man is still interested in her but alas, Andrew is not having it. He is not ready to be the mumu that is the second class guy, the rebound fella so he does what Kerry did to him before, he humiliates her as well. A good guy has been turned bad. No young man grows up thinking, i am going to be a playa! Believe it or not, he is the product of an earlier encounter with a girl.
Ladies, follow me on another journey as we take a look at Robin. Robin is a jambite, green nose freshman in uni and he spots a really nice girl. He starts to chat with Jane, a freshman/jambite as well. One day, Robin was walking Jane back to the room on campus (after paying for her dinner) when a car pulls up next to them. Steve, a third year student that happens to be a club/frat boy beckons to jane to enter the car and without second thoughts about Robin, she jumps in and they drive off. You see, Robin cannot afford to drive a car on campus and he is not a club/frat boy but what he lacks in those "qualities", he makes for in integrity, sincerity and honesty but those are not qualities women look for?!
Robin is left with a hole not only in his heart but also in his pocket. From that day on, Jane becomes a big girl on campus cos the guy whose attention she is enjoying for the moment is a club/frat boy with a car.
When frat boy finishes with Jane, we know what happens next. Ladies you know the rest. It has happened to someone you know.
Meanwhile, Robin swears to himself that he will never be humiliated like that again so he too goes after a car and becomes the club/frat boy that disrecpects women and treats them with comtempt.
What i am about to write will put me in trouble with the "league of brothers" but i have seen too many female friends go through life without understanding the most basic of dynamics in the boy/girl relationship so hear goes;
Do not emasculate a man! That is it. The holy grail of answers to the one burning question in the heart of many women.
I hear the wrong set of women bellowing "can't you handle a strong woman, a woman that goes after what she wants, damning the consequences?"
I laugh. I laugh in the face of that rubbish because i know of no "stronger women" than my sisters but they unlike many, understand that unless you want to re-wire a man (which you can never achieve), you have to understand the fine balance of strenght against aggression. Too many women today do not know where to draw the line and mistake their aggression for strength. Emasculating a man is the greatest sign of aggression towards the man.
Nowadays, i hear this rubbish called "girlpower" being thrown around as a way of encouraging women to forget the true values that make them "Ladies" and behave in the same way as the most vile of men behave. This is not strength and there is no power in that. True strength comes in being able to display the right "qualities" while being "strong" enough to discard this modern rubbish of doing whatever you like, whenever.
I have a lot of respect for "strong" women that pursue goals and are high achievers who understand that (for most women), the respect and adoration of her strength by her family is more important than the acclaim of the lonely bra burning feminist that want nothing more than for other women to be as lonely and miserable as they are.
One of the people i hold up as a role model happens to be a friend of about 24yrs, whom i believe is a yr younger than i am. She is a true inspiration with the things she has done and achieved in her life. She embodies all that is right about what it means to be a "strong" woman while understanding that lifting up those around you is by far better than telling them that "if you can't deal with it, you know where to go." As much as she has achieved, she does not hesitate to listen, stand to be corrected and learn.
Heaven forbid you try engage some sisters in a conversation/debate about an issue nowadays, you are in trouble for not just saying "yes dear" bacause women nowadays want men they can push around, deny it all you want.
How many women actually understand that the more you push a man, the less you get?
On too many occasions it has been made clear that the less you push, the more you get. A man will always do that which you want to please you, if you are less pushy.
Stop, i hear the brothers saying. I am giving away too much but i feel that the more we are all able to learn, the more likelihood of reducing the ever growing number of divorces in the African communities.
Finally, women, if you take nothing away from my ramblings, understand this, and i am speaking from a man's angle, the success of a relationship/marriage is in your hands. The way you choose to handle every aspect of your relationship especially the increasingly sharpened tongues, decides if you will remain happy or become a statistic.
Understanding that you will be "stronger" for doing that which on the surface makes you look weak but actually gives you control surely is the way forward.
Think about it.
P.S I am only a voice of reason, not an enemy of progress.
Verbalising
A friend once complained that the "Art of conversation" was dead, indeed, i agreed with him.
Nobody feels to need to speak out any more than they are given the time of day to express their thoughts. So it was refreshing yesterday that i was able to have a conversation that helped clean the air of the horrible stench of misunderstanding.
To some people, i talk alot but to some, i don't say enough but as long as you give me the opportunity to express myself and i do the same for you, there would be no need for air freshners to mask the horrible stench of misunderstanding.
Nobody feels to need to speak out any more than they are given the time of day to express their thoughts. So it was refreshing yesterday that i was able to have a conversation that helped clean the air of the horrible stench of misunderstanding.
To some people, i talk alot but to some, i don't say enough but as long as you give me the opportunity to express myself and i do the same for you, there would be no need for air freshners to mask the horrible stench of misunderstanding.
Monday, 12 November 2007
Measuring the food we eat
A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and
while
he's drinking, the monkey jumps all around the place. The monkey
grabs
some olives off the bar and eats them. Then he grabs some sliced limes
and eats them. He then jumps onto the pool table and grabs one of the
billiard balls. To everyone's amazement, he sticks it in his mouth,
and somehow swallows it whole.
The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just
did?"
"No, what?"
"He just ate the cue ball off my pool table... whole!"
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy, "he eats everything
in sight. Sorry! I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." The guy
finishes his drink, pays his bill, pays for the stuff the monkey ate
and leaves.
Two weeks later the guy is in the bar again, and has his monkey with
him.
He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again.
While the man is finishing his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino
cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out,
and eats it. Then the monkey finds a peanut, and again sticks it up
his butt, pulls it out, and eats it.
The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?"
"No, what?" replied the man.
"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry and a peanut up his butt, pulled
them out, and ate them!" said the bartender.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy. "He still eats
everything in sight, but ever since he had to pass that cue ball, he
measures everything first."
while
he's drinking, the monkey jumps all around the place. The monkey
grabs
some olives off the bar and eats them. Then he grabs some sliced limes
and eats them. He then jumps onto the pool table and grabs one of the
billiard balls. To everyone's amazement, he sticks it in his mouth,
and somehow swallows it whole.
The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just
did?"
"No, what?"
"He just ate the cue ball off my pool table... whole!"
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy, "he eats everything
in sight. Sorry! I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." The guy
finishes his drink, pays his bill, pays for the stuff the monkey ate
and leaves.
Two weeks later the guy is in the bar again, and has his monkey with
him.
He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again.
While the man is finishing his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino
cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out,
and eats it. Then the monkey finds a peanut, and again sticks it up
his butt, pulls it out, and eats it.
The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did now?"
"No, what?" replied the man.
"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry and a peanut up his butt, pulled
them out, and ate them!" said the bartender.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy. "He still eats
everything in sight, but ever since he had to pass that cue ball, he
measures everything first."
Open letter to the bossman
Dear Bossman,
I am writing to apologise for my absent mindedness today at work.
As you know, i am not always like this. I come into to work and give the last drop of blood in my system each day but today has not been so. Much as i have tried, i can not get my mind away from certain things. Today has indeed been a revelation for me as i could not have foreseen the way my day has been turned into a less than productive day for you.
Being the thoughtful employee that i am, i will no doubt accept it if you decide to deduct my wages for an unproductive day(if you try am?).
I promise you that when i get back to the office on wednesday, i will resume giving all the blood and sweat in my system again for the little returns i so graciously accept as my wages.
Your Honest employee,
Me
I am writing to apologise for my absent mindedness today at work.
As you know, i am not always like this. I come into to work and give the last drop of blood in my system each day but today has not been so. Much as i have tried, i can not get my mind away from certain things. Today has indeed been a revelation for me as i could not have foreseen the way my day has been turned into a less than productive day for you.
Being the thoughtful employee that i am, i will no doubt accept it if you decide to deduct my wages for an unproductive day(if you try am?).
I promise you that when i get back to the office on wednesday, i will resume giving all the blood and sweat in my system again for the little returns i so graciously accept as my wages.
Your Honest employee,
Me
Waited
About this time of the day for about one week, i get a phone call. Not today though, leaves me wondering............
The Ball & Chain
A friend is getting married very soon.
I could feel all the brothers breathing heavy for a lost one. I know fellas, he has finally agreed to allow the ball and chain to be tied around his ankles.
While we as "brother men" look on the negative side of allowing someone be responsible for your future emotional state of mind and not to talk of the size of our miserable bank accounts, i can not but be happy for a brother that finds a good woman.
D-money, my best wishes to you and the future missus. I know you guys have been going to a while now and you know you have found a good woman.
Can you all join me in wishing my boy and his future wife all the best in the future.
We will come and light up brummie land for you!
I could feel all the brothers breathing heavy for a lost one. I know fellas, he has finally agreed to allow the ball and chain to be tied around his ankles.
While we as "brother men" look on the negative side of allowing someone be responsible for your future emotional state of mind and not to talk of the size of our miserable bank accounts, i can not but be happy for a brother that finds a good woman.
D-money, my best wishes to you and the future missus. I know you guys have been going to a while now and you know you have found a good woman.
Can you all join me in wishing my boy and his future wife all the best in the future.
We will come and light up brummie land for you!
More vaseline
A dear friend had her house warming this saturday but i was unable to attend for some reasons. Girl, you know you are a dear friend and i am sorry i could not make it but i will bring vim and scrubbing brush to come and help you wash the house at another convinient time for you.
Well done and more petroleum jelly to your elbows.
Well done and more petroleum jelly to your elbows.
Forgive me Lord, for i have sinned
This blog space is my one place where i actually speak my peace and for that i reason, i tend to sin alot here.
I was guilty in my last blog space of writing things i could or would not say to people cos i did not want to hurt peoples feelings. In doing that, i really used to let loose and speak my mind to myself, helping to purge my spirit. Little did i know i was sinning.
I was taught in church that the things we say go a long way in determining how our future experiences will shape up. Some might say that i am not actually speaking but merely writing but the Bible says
"Let the words of our mouth and the meditations of our heart be acceptable in the sight of God"
Trully, some, pardon me, most of the meditations of my heart are not acceptable and for these i am sorry Lord.
Teach me how to create a new heart, not just everyday, but everytime i feel wronged so that the meditations of my heart are not sinfull in your sight.
To those who i have been guilty of criticising in past blog spaces and this new one, i ask that you forgive me.
I know that no one ever read my past blogs but i still feel the need to say a big sorry for the meditations of my heart and to you, i know you know who you are, i am sorry for my venting, sorry for making you feel like i was not listening and even more sorry for the meditations of my heart since last night.
More importantly though, forgive me Lord for i know i have sinned.
I was guilty in my last blog space of writing things i could or would not say to people cos i did not want to hurt peoples feelings. In doing that, i really used to let loose and speak my mind to myself, helping to purge my spirit. Little did i know i was sinning.
I was taught in church that the things we say go a long way in determining how our future experiences will shape up. Some might say that i am not actually speaking but merely writing but the Bible says
"Let the words of our mouth and the meditations of our heart be acceptable in the sight of God"
Trully, some, pardon me, most of the meditations of my heart are not acceptable and for these i am sorry Lord.
Teach me how to create a new heart, not just everyday, but everytime i feel wronged so that the meditations of my heart are not sinfull in your sight.
To those who i have been guilty of criticising in past blog spaces and this new one, i ask that you forgive me.
I know that no one ever read my past blogs but i still feel the need to say a big sorry for the meditations of my heart and to you, i know you know who you are, i am sorry for my venting, sorry for making you feel like i was not listening and even more sorry for the meditations of my heart since last night.
More importantly though, forgive me Lord for i know i have sinned.
Widows might
Why is enough not enough?
I have struggled for the past 12hrs to try and understand why what i do is never enough. I have noticed that no matter what you do, the world always wants more.
We are all neck deep in this world of "do more for me" that we do not take the time to really appreciate the things that people do, small as it might be to you. I had in the past been guilty of this but as the years roled on, i have learned to accept people and appreciate them for who they are and the things they do.
Expectations! That is the problem of the world. It is no longer about what you get but what you expect of the person. I try as much as i can to explain this to people but it seems that it all flies out of the other ear or i cannot get a word in.
Kids are no longer happy with the little the parents can afford. Now, they write a list of things they want not bothering to think about how the parents will pay for the things. Gone are the days when as kids, our eyes would light up cos daddy came back home from work with a packet of biscuits for us to share. We were taught to appreciate the things we were given and not have expectations of people cos when they do not live up to our grand billing, we criticise them for not doing enough.
I happen to be one of those people that get affected by people who criticise me for not living up to there expectations, chosing not to look at the big picture and see that i have indeed tried to do much more than they expect. We place to much emphasis on the little things while the really important things get no mention.
You might wonder why i am venting this morning but as usual, i will not go into specifics. I have been smacked on the head, face and butt by someone that has expectations of me but forgets to appreciate the effort i put in to do the things she pays little attention to.
How many of us actually realise that a person that decides to drive for miles to come and pay you a visit has just risked life? If i was sitting down in my living room watching the premiership as other guys would have done, i will not put my life in the hands of other road users as myself. Road users i know not who they are. How many Husbands, wives, boyfriends and girlfriends have met untimely deaths just because they are on the road, trying to do one thing or the other for a partner? Can you legislate for a drunk driver or boy racer coming from nowhere? Is my life not worth much more than gold or whatever thing you are criticising me for not doing?
I am truly hurt, much more than i can write because my time, precious as it might be to me, means nothing to other people. Not the fact that i stood up other people either, people i might add that mean a great deal to me.
What is it with people that want you to give to them the little intangible things they hold so dearly while that which you cherish and give means nothing?
I ask that before you criticise me for not laughing at your joke, not looking at the tv screen the way you like, not watching a tv program that you are enjoying, not trying hard enough to stay awake at night after a long day, not buying the type of chocolate you want, not reacting when you start acusing me of all sorts, not shutting up cos you say so, listening to you and trying to put forward my own case, that you take a moment to appreciate the fact that i am there in the first place.
I am not saying that i am the big i am so my presence should be celebrated with 12 virgins, all i am saying is appreciate me enough not to criticise everything i do cos it is because i appreciate you that i do the "little" that goes un-noticed.
I have struggled for the past 12hrs to try and understand why what i do is never enough. I have noticed that no matter what you do, the world always wants more.
We are all neck deep in this world of "do more for me" that we do not take the time to really appreciate the things that people do, small as it might be to you. I had in the past been guilty of this but as the years roled on, i have learned to accept people and appreciate them for who they are and the things they do.
Expectations! That is the problem of the world. It is no longer about what you get but what you expect of the person. I try as much as i can to explain this to people but it seems that it all flies out of the other ear or i cannot get a word in.
Kids are no longer happy with the little the parents can afford. Now, they write a list of things they want not bothering to think about how the parents will pay for the things. Gone are the days when as kids, our eyes would light up cos daddy came back home from work with a packet of biscuits for us to share. We were taught to appreciate the things we were given and not have expectations of people cos when they do not live up to our grand billing, we criticise them for not doing enough.
I happen to be one of those people that get affected by people who criticise me for not living up to there expectations, chosing not to look at the big picture and see that i have indeed tried to do much more than they expect. We place to much emphasis on the little things while the really important things get no mention.
You might wonder why i am venting this morning but as usual, i will not go into specifics. I have been smacked on the head, face and butt by someone that has expectations of me but forgets to appreciate the effort i put in to do the things she pays little attention to.
How many of us actually realise that a person that decides to drive for miles to come and pay you a visit has just risked life? If i was sitting down in my living room watching the premiership as other guys would have done, i will not put my life in the hands of other road users as myself. Road users i know not who they are. How many Husbands, wives, boyfriends and girlfriends have met untimely deaths just because they are on the road, trying to do one thing or the other for a partner? Can you legislate for a drunk driver or boy racer coming from nowhere? Is my life not worth much more than gold or whatever thing you are criticising me for not doing?
I am truly hurt, much more than i can write because my time, precious as it might be to me, means nothing to other people. Not the fact that i stood up other people either, people i might add that mean a great deal to me.
What is it with people that want you to give to them the little intangible things they hold so dearly while that which you cherish and give means nothing?
I ask that before you criticise me for not laughing at your joke, not looking at the tv screen the way you like, not watching a tv program that you are enjoying, not trying hard enough to stay awake at night after a long day, not buying the type of chocolate you want, not reacting when you start acusing me of all sorts, not shutting up cos you say so, listening to you and trying to put forward my own case, that you take a moment to appreciate the fact that i am there in the first place.
I am not saying that i am the big i am so my presence should be celebrated with 12 virgins, all i am saying is appreciate me enough not to criticise everything i do cos it is because i appreciate you that i do the "little" that goes un-noticed.
Thursday, 1 November 2007
The beauty of hindsight
How many times have we all done something, jumped into conclusions only to have egg plastered all over our faces when we finally come to the realization that we were wrong?
I find that i am more guilty than most people when it comes to this even though most times, i do not voice out my prejudices. My mind is a maze of funny thoughts and without giving me any warning, comes round to certain decisions but, this is where the joke is on my mind, my mouth is alot more mature - my only saving grace.
Once again, i found myself pre-judging a situation in my head only for me to find out that i was wrong again - suprise, suprise!
I more than most have to thank God for the gift of a mature mouth that does not open up everything the brian sparks a wire.
Unlike many blogs you will read, i intend to use this blogspace as a place where i can honestly document my short-comings in hope that as i read them over and over again, i will learn in the least, to appreciate my mouth a lot more.
I find that i am more guilty than most people when it comes to this even though most times, i do not voice out my prejudices. My mind is a maze of funny thoughts and without giving me any warning, comes round to certain decisions but, this is where the joke is on my mind, my mouth is alot more mature - my only saving grace.
Once again, i found myself pre-judging a situation in my head only for me to find out that i was wrong again - suprise, suprise!
I more than most have to thank God for the gift of a mature mouth that does not open up everything the brian sparks a wire.
Unlike many blogs you will read, i intend to use this blogspace as a place where i can honestly document my short-comings in hope that as i read them over and over again, i will learn in the least, to appreciate my mouth a lot more.
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